Relax love ain’t going nowhere.
1. You will lessen your chances to attract and keep a man if you run after men all the time. Ok ladies, yea i know he’s fine..probably super fine. I get that. But give that man some space. Always remember the line from back in the day: If it’s for you it isn’t going anywhere. I’m here to reiterate that to you. There’s a better way than wishing things will blossom with a man by telling him how much you are thinking about him repeatedly, or telling him all your business thinking that you two will form a bond that way. NO NO NO. As a woman who has been on some dates in my lifetime and spoken with hundreds of woman and studied relationships over all. I’m here to tell you personally from a man’s perspective MEN WANT TO BE THE MAN. You gotta allow a man to pursue you. Most men are that way, at least that’s what they tell me. So ladies, put your energy into being receptive to a man getting to know you. Relax and enjoy the process of slow movement. Yes, you can still call the shots overall..Because i’m not talking about having sex with a man to be receptive to him, while you’re getting to know him. Honestly..we will speak more on that one in a few minutes.
You are where it’s at!
2. Your chances of landing a solid, healthy relationship will drop to almost 1% if you are needy and don’t want to be alone. I’ll say it again. Yes the man is shole nuff fine. However it is you I’m concerned about here. Think about your life this way, you were born alone. You should learn the magic art of being happy and content right now. Sure it is easy to do when you have a healthy support system in place. The important thing to know is that, NO man comes along to be your support system. You alone have to learn the art of making that a reality for yourself. Everyone isn’t cut out to be a counselor, coach or consultant. So why would you expect a stranger to provide such services to you, out of the clear blue sky and on top of that…FREE. No honey. I feel you but you have to enjoy the skin you’re in. Think about some of the things you enjoy doing and visualize the joy of doing them with yourself. The world will be much brighter once you take your time and smile about what you have access to. YOU HAVE IT ALL. Look at you:-). Think of it this way, how will a man want to spend time with you, if you don’t want to do the same. There is something magical that happens..i’m here to tell you personally! When you get into what you enjoy, even if it involves helping others in someway..thats even better! The universe shifts to bring you the people who match your frequency energetically. i’m not playing. Work it out and give it a shot. You owe it to you to enjoy life even more. And don’t think about a relationship like that, because your date is waiting for your vibration to raise up and then like a magician, he will certainly show his face.
Slow down, Enjoy.
3. Trust me when i say: Men enjoy a challenge. If you give everything on the first date: is there really an incentive for a man to stay around and get to know more about you? Probably not. Right. So here’s the deal. There are so many other things you and your fine date can get into to with your clothes on. Also it is better to keep all your deep childhood history and past relationship details to yourself. Studies show that a conversation about past relationships and sex both have damaging effects on a future potential relationship between two people. Why is that? Hmm i would say it’s because man want women who are light and joyful. If you share a story where you experience the entire misfortune in your head and you allow him to experience your thoughts and feelings about too much of your life too soon. He may not call back. You want to keep life simple and move on from the past before you decide to move into the hot land of relationships. I’m here to tell you. This will save you so much time and frustration in the future. Take your time. Rock his world with mystery not the heavy baggage.
Real recognizes real.
4. Learn to be yourself, don’t fake it. The truth will always come out. Whoever you are..trust there is someone out there just for you. Sure it might be cute to act like you are someone you are not. The question is, how long will you be able to keep that up. Over time everyone lets their masks fall and people will always know more of what is there. Karma is something. Just be you. If you don’t like who you are. Change it up. Elevate, Get creative and mix it up. We all have work to do. Keep it real and everything will be right!
There are other men out there.
5. Never compromise your standards just to have an attractive man on your tip. You know what I’m talking about. He looks good, smells like paradise but he has no values, no game plan and he wears his draws down to his knees . He told you he was not ever getting married. He said he wants to be single for life. HA! OK. So that’s not your ideal man. You knew it when he started breaking it down to you at lunch or on the corner. You aren’t that damn lonely. This is why its important to learn to love yourself. If you aren’t joyful about your life and who you are. You may fall for anything. You are way too smart to waste your life on people undeserving of your time. The next time you see something or someone who doesn’t fall in line with your Values (if you don’t have some, get some) my advice: KEEP IT MOVING BLISSFULLY…HONEY you don’t have time for that!
6. Listen to your heart..the inner wisdom..if something doesn’t feel right its a good idea to talk about it or move on from it. Here is a good example: You are on a date with a sexy man. He’s charming, sweet and opening up to you. everything goes well until (OH NO HE DIDN’T)… OH YES HE DID: He reaches down and grabs your behind. It’s the first date. You are looking like? ‘Uh i’m not feeling that.’ At that point you have a couple of choices on how to deal with it. First of all, stay calm. There’s no need to act up. Let’s not put too much energy into this. Instead, feel your inner wisdom and if you know whatever this man did is outside of your (VALUES) then you can say peace..thank you for the nice time and say i have to go now, and talk to him later about it or never again. Its best not to get into it while on the date as it will leave a staleness in the air. When the date is over you can politely tell him If you are planning on going out with him..let him know who you are and what your values are. Keep it brief. If he wants to really get to know you. He will totally understand. And if he doesn’t its just the opposite and that’s quite alright too. You have absolutely nothing to lose but foolishness. So smile and be proud of yourself for whatever decision you make. You will be glad you did. You know it too.
Is he into you?
7. If men don’t call you, they are just not interested! I’ve been there, you’ve been there. Waiting by the phone for a phone call. Excuse me, i know some of you haven’t had that experience since home phones were hot. There are so many reasons to call you right? RIGHT! so if you hear a man telling you all this sweet stuff. But, he never gets around to calling you, EVER. He’s not that into you. Period. There is no other way to interpret this thing. We all know it takes communication of some sort to get to know someone on any level. We all can agree that relationships don’t just happen by accident. They certainly don’t. So if he is across the world, there is a way to contact you, If he is working late, he can call you, if its been a month and he hasn’t called… fill in the blank again with the same words (he’s not that into you) If you think you should chase a man down to get his attention. Uhh please re-read the rules from the top down. If you don’t trust this. Just try it and find out. Better yet. Just take my word for it and call it a day. Go do your toes or watch a movie. But don’t sit around waiting in vain. If you are just friends that all it is.
You set the pace
8. Men like to take their time too, even though it may not seem like it to you. Some women move too fast for even men. I’m talking about men that want to be in a relationship or married with a family one day. Back to the loose women, Yeah i know we’re not talking about you here. However some women have this idea of covering up the pain they have inside by repeating their mistakes over and over with men who either don’t want them in any other way but sexually or they throw themselves at men that are already spoken for. You deserve better and they deserve better. If only you knew how Karma works is all I’ll say. Sistahs it’s not worth it. He damn sure ain’t worth it. And the entire situation is a waste of energy to top it all. Nothing good can ever come of it. There are men who say they want to take their time. Some men have told me that women never make them wait for even 6 months before they sleep with them. They even said they would love to have a woman who would make them wait. Of course that’s some men. But trust me ladies its more men that want us to make them wait than the other way around. And women don’t know the power they have. If you have read all the rules until this point you know the ball is in your court. All I’ll say here is get some values my sistahs. Enjoy the little things. It’s not too late to make a change either.
Law of Attraction and you.
9. You attract men on the same vibration that you are on. Don’t be mad at this one simply change you and you will see a whole new model in your life of friends and of course in the men you attract. This one is a no-brainer..its all about the Law of Attraction. It’s not personal. When you learn to love you, the world will too.
Allow room for growth to take place.
10. Don’t Expect a man to change unless you want him to resent you. Bossing a man around is not the way into his heart. That’s right. Last time i checked, resentment was not one of the elements of a happy healthy relationship. If you want to build a solid relationship with your potential lover, you have to allow him to make mistakes and allow him to learn from them. We as woman are allowed that luxury so we owe it to the men to give them the same love and respect. We are all on earth to learn the lessons of life. Most people had a personality and a life before they ever met us. We have to remember that and celebrate who they are. Of course foolishness and unhealthy behavior should be talked about but choose your talks wisely. You don’t want to create a problem where there is none. And some comments/ perceptions/ observations should be reflected (within us) before they should be considered conversation worthy. Sometimes we as women feel we should protect our interests in every possible way so no one can take advantage of us. This is why sometimes some women make a fuss when there is none. In-fact the only issue sometimes is the thoughts. Learn to visualize peaceful things and love. See your mate healed and being all that you know they are holistically. Your visualizations will help to bring out the good in them. Use your powerful imagination ladies to bring about change in you and in your families. Indeed our greatest strength is within.